CBS is suing Howard Stern for $500 million dollars, claiming that Stern violated his contract by promoting on his CBS-owned terrestrial-radio show his January 2006 move to SIRIUS Satellite Radio. The company alleges in its 43-page filing that the violations took place from October of 2004 through the end of 2005.

In other words, the violations took place over a 15-month period during which CBS continued to broadcast Stern’s program with the full knowledge that he was moving to SIRIUS, and that he frequently was talking about that impending move. So why did they leave him on the air? Because he made them a shitload of money during that time period (not to mention during the two-plus decades leading up to his departure).

Not only did they leave Stern on the air; they refused to remove him despite his repeated on-air pleadings that they release him from his contract—without pay—so that he and they could just move on, since the split was inevitable.

That’s like inviting someone into your house, clothing them, feeding them and putting them up in a guest room for months on end, all the while insisting that they not leave, and then, when the guest finally moves into his own place, suing him for stealing your clothes, eating your food and trespassing.

And what would drive CBS to stick a knife in the back of the one entertainer who earned the company more money than any other on its roster? I’ll let David Hinckley of the New York Daily News explain:

Arbitrend ratings released yesterday show that in January, [Stern replacement David Lee] Roth’s first month, [Stern’s former station] WFNY’s morning share among its target audience of 18- to 34-year-olds fell from 13.8% to 1.3%.

Ouch!

Radio & Records daily news editor Adam Jacobson, who is quoted in Hinckley’s article, puts it in simpler terms:

“This is perhaps one of the biggest and most high-profile failures in radio history. These ratings show that all of New York has pretty much rejected Roth.”

Double ouch!

I’ve already shared my thoughts on Roth’s foray into radio, so I won’t rehash that again. However, as a SIRIUS subscriber, I can assure you that the fact of the matter is this: old-fashioned, boring radio is fucked. Satellite radio is to FM/AM what cable television is to VHF/UHF. The suits at CBS have finally woken up to that fact now that their stations are tanking, and are dealing with that realization by acting like a jilted ex-wife.

What they should have done was stand up to the FCC when they had the chance. Instead, they caved in to the government and made Stern do his show with a muzzle on for the past 15 years. Their own lack of balls and foresight are why Stern is now at SIRIUS.

And now I shall sit back and smile with satisfaction as he proceeds to tear down the very industry that he turned into a cash cow.

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